Reality “dating” shows distort reality in a way that feeds our baser natures, monetizing a pact between exhibitionists and voyeurs. In a world that already struggles with its understanding of romance and human sexual relationships, these shows are culturally devastating. With a new entry into this genre, “Down for Love,” exploiting people with Down syndrome, takes this paradigm to a new low.
Headlines promise “Down for Love,” which has found its way into the Netflix top 10, will “restore your faith in dating shows.” Some living with Down syndrome and their families might find it charming, but as the father of a son in his early 20s with Down syndrome, I resent a television show that makes a curiosity out of the vulnerabilities of young people with Down syndrome as they struggle to find meaningful relationships. We’re assured by reviewers that it is unlike other dating shows that “revel in making their participants as uncomfortable as possible,” but dating and relationships in the 21st century are complicated for everyone. That is especially true for persons living with intellectual and developmental disabilities.
I am very aware of my son’s natural desire for relationships and intimacy, but I also understand the limits of his capacity to understand what that means so he can successfully act on that desire. Pope St. John Paul II spoke beautifully of this in his 2004 message to participants in the International Symposium on the Dignity and Rights of the Mentally Disabled Person.
“The care of the emotional and sexual dimensions of disabled persons deserves special attention.
